Black Lives Matter & The Victim Mentality
This post was written June 2, 2020 on my law of attraction life coaching blog. I’ll be uploading the old posts to start this new substack up.
The topic of this article is firstly focused on the victim mentality (which is detrimental). It looks secondly at how to take back your power. The social topic of the day (June 2, 2020 #BlackOutTuesday) is Black Lives Matter, so, thirdly, I will discuss racism and how to get rid of it.
Law of Attraction
This article is going to focus on the law of attraction because that is the topic of this website. If you’ve never heard of the law of attraction or don’t understand it, it is a view of life that basically says what you’re feeling and thinking about will continue to show up in your life. If you’re feeling optimistic about something and expecting it to happen, it will appear in your life in some form. The placebo effect shows that this is the case. If you’re feeling pessimistic and expecting negative things to happen, you will likely get what you’re expecting in some form. This is why when you’re in a bad mood you drop things or trip, and when you’re in a good mood you can move around as if you’re floating on air and hit all the green lights.
The Drama Triangle
Stephen Karpman created the social model which he called the Drama Triangle in an article published in 1968. The reason why he chose the label “Drama Triangle” rather than “Conflict Triangle” is because the people feel or act as if they are either Rescuer, Victim, or Persecutor. Just because someone feels like they are a victim or a hero doesn’t actually make them one.
If you’re interested in this Drama Triangle topic check out my Drama of It All substack.
My Personal Experience
If we take a moment to reflect on our lives we can probably see how we have fit one role or another throughout our lives. While I was studying the triangle out during my Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) course, I decided to devote some videos to the topic. I know I’ve felt like a victim before and I seriously don’t like it. If you would like a better understanding of the drama triangle and how it relates to the Law of Attraction you can watch my playlist.
Victimhood is in your mind
The reason I don’t like feeling like a victim is because I am not a victim. None of us are victims, ever. The CBT course has made this so clear to me. Victimhood is all in your mind. You can choose to feel like one at times, like someone putting on a mask and performing in a role. But you are always free to take off the mask (quit the role) at any time.
“No one is ever a victim, although your conquerors would have you believe in your own victimhood. How else could they conquer you?” Barbara Marciniak, Family of Light: Pleiadian Tales and Lessons in Living
We Have Power
We always have the power to see things from a higher perspective.
We always have the power to not let things affect us.
We always are free to transmute what has happened to us into a better future for ourselves.
Viktor E. Frankl, a holocaust survivor, wrote in Man’s Search for Meaning, “Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms—to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way.”
This priest does a great job summing up in 2 minutes why forgiving people is about taking back your power. You always had the power but you give it away to those who persecute you when you hold grudges. You are always free to take it back at any time by forgiving them. Resistance to life keeps everything you have been asking for away from you. I’ll discuss that further below. Not forgiving people (or events) is resistance to life. You’re only hurting yourself by your unforgiveness.
“Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of harming another; you end up getting burned.” (Not a Buddha exact quote, but close)
Everything is working out for us
Everything that comes into our lives is working out for our best interests in the long term. Everything that we dislike is a step one moment. The five main steps of creation (according to Abraham) are discussed more fully on the about law of attraction page. But the first three steps are as follows:
In Step 1 you explore contrast and from that contrast you come to personal preferences. For example, we see mistreatment of others (that is contrast). Our personal preference is to to have everyone treated kindly, so we ask for universal love and peace.
In Step 2, your spirit (inner being, higher self, god, whatever term you prefer) receives your rockets of desires from Step 1. Then your spirit focuses upon it, and law of attraction responds to THAT powerful point of focus. Now all cooperative components are being attracted to your spirit’s point of focus on your behalf. Vibrationally speaking, you have already received what you asked for. It’s been given.
In Step 3 you move into the direction of your desire by releasing resistance to it. You do this by ignoring “what is” currently and focusing on being appreciative in the present, optimistic for the future, and finally feeling as if you already have what you desired in the first place. This takes faith which is why it’s the hardest step.
Step 2 Feels Bad Because of Vibrational Dissonance
Abraham (Abraham-Hicks Publications) discusses this idea in the book The Astonishing Power of Emotions.
“Because life has caused you to expand, and because the Law of Attraction is now responding to the vibration of that expanded you, you can now consciously feel your response to that moving Energy. That is precisely what your emotions are.
If the thoughts you are thinking, in this moment, are in alignment with the vibration of the Broader you, you feel the harmony of that alignment in the form of positive-feeling emotions.
But if the thoughts you are thinking in this moment are out of alignment with the vibration of the Broader You, you feel the disharmony of that alignment in the form of negative emotions.”
Black Lives Matter & Step 1
Many people who protest, protest because they feel as if some people think black lives don’t actually matter. If the focus is on people who think black lives don’t matter this is a focus on what you do not want. That is a step 1 moment. It’s perfectly natural to see things in the world that you do not like and to want things to be different. The more and more people focus on what they do not want, the more they create (vibrationally) what they do want. There is nothing wrong with that.
Getting What We Want
In order to actually receive the world in which we live in peace and everyone’s lives matter and racism doesn’t exist, we need to release resistance. There’s already been a lot of asking for it. The only thing that holds back that idyllic future is our resistance, the continued focus on what we do not want.
What keeps racism alive?
Unforgiveness is resistance. If you can calmly talk about the past without anger you will see that all races have been treated unfairly at one point in time. It’s what happened in the past. We didn’t like it. We should be moving on because, at our core, we all want everyone to be treated kindly. Only those who still have unforgiveness would even consider hurting another. Hurt people hurt people. If we can forgive, then we can move on.
History classes: Continued focus on what happened in the past and focusing with anger at what happened, keeps it coming. This doesn’t mean we get rid of history classes, but all cases in all races can be mentioned and they can be discussed without anger or unforgiveness. They could (in the future) even be taught with an appreciation that we all know racism is wrong and we’re glad to have moved on and that it’s all in the past.
The Media: Television gives angry people a voice. The more the news focuses on what it doesn’t like, the more those things will happen. According to the law of attraction what you look for is what you will see more of. The news programs look for negative things going on and continue to create more of it. Movies get created about events and can stir up emotions also. If everyone turned off the TV and just interacted with their local communities we would not see as many of these issues in our day-to-day lives.
Parents & Communities: There are many successful black people in this country. It’s very possible for them to succeed in whatever they want to succeed in. Sadly, certain homes and communities have a limiting belief that says black children will have a more difficult time in their lives than white children will. This is why they created the term “White Privilege.” Privilege exists only in the mind. If an black child was brought up in a community and family where they were taught they could be or do anything, they would not have that limiting belief (that they couldn’t) holding them back in life.
People who don’t forgive. Rallies and protests that continue violence only create more of it. When people are hurt, they feel powerless, and take on that role of the victim. If they do not realize that they have the ability to take back their power with their mind, then they seek other ways to feel powerful. This is what the riots are about, people who feel like victims trying to take back power by force. They hurt their own communities in the process. It’s not very smart, but it’s understandable. People are not taught that they have power to control their minds.
Racism fighting racism: Saying things like, “Check your privilege,” is resistant in nature. It is pitting one group against another by race, as if everyone weren’t equally powerful. It is racism. As long as you feel you are not on the same level as everyone else you will not be able to see racism as being gone, because you’re continuing it by being racist yourself. The law of attraction means you can change your life through your mind. You are powerful, but so is everyone else.
Calling yourself a victim: Continuing to label yourself a victim will make sure that you filter your life through those lenses. You will be less likely to see ways in which you are powerful, and more likely to find ways in which you’re dis-empowered. You attract more of how you feel.
“There is another class of coloured people who make a business of keeping the troubles, the wrongs, and the hardships of the Negro race before the public. Having learned that they are able to make a living out of their troubles, they have grown into the settled habit of advertising their wrongs — partly because they want sympathy and partly because it pays. Some of these people do not want the Negro to lose his grievances, because they do not want to lose their jobs.” ― Booker T. Washington
Stopping Racism
Since everyone has asked for racism to be over with, vibrationally speaking it is. This is why many black people are super successful. There is no such thing as “White Privilege.” People are as privileged as their minds allow them to be. Everyone has the exact same spirit and exact same power to be whatever they want to be in this world.
Fixing Limiting Beliefs
Nothing is holding anyone back except for their limiting beliefs that say they can’t be or do whatever they like. If you disagree with that, I suggest taking a course on Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) and learning more about it.
You have the power to control your mind.
Your mind controls what experiences you have.
Therefore you have control over what experiences you have.
People who start believing that a world without racism is possible are a lot closer to experiencing it than those who think it’s impossible. If you don’t believe it’s possible, you can’t see it. You perceive what you believe.
The Himba tribe has a lot of words for various shades of green and can distinguish between shades of green better than those who don’t speak that language. What does that mean? The more you can imagine or know of possibilities, then the easier they are to see. When you don’t know of those possibilities, or can’t put a word to it, then you can not easily see them.
Steps to stopping racism
There is a vibrational reality in which we all can love one another without paying any attention to what shade we come in.
Forgiveness is a required. Unforgiveness is a form of resistance. You will be stuck in step 2 feeling awful if you cannot line up with your spirit and the fact that, vibrationally speaking, racism is already gone. In my experience those who hold onto anger tend to scapegoat onto the “other” race that they are upset with. By trying to fight racism with anger they tend to just become racists themselves.
Stop regurgitating the past and warning people about it, because continued focus on what you don’t want will bring more of it to you. Focusing on what you do want will bring it close to you. When you focus on what you do want, you will start to notice the unconditional love that you are looking for.
Stop worrying about what’s going on in other cities, and focus on your own family and communities. Be the change that you want to see in the world. When you are kind to everyone, regardless of race, you will see others pick up that habit (unconditional love vibration) and they will spread it to others.
Feel the unconditional love of all people, forgiving all, holding no grudges, and imagine the world the way you want it to be. Meditate on this and you will start to attract more of that feeling into your life. If you are still unforgiving you won’t be able to feel this feeling, so remember to forgive.
Take back your power by releasing limiting beliefs. Understand that you don’t have to play the victim role. Say, “I’m not a victim; I’m a victor.” And embrace that, through the law of attraction, everyone has the exact same amount of power to control their own individual lives. We are truly created equal.