When Beginning to Meditate is Difficult

Meditating doesn't always look the way you think it should

I often tell people to meditate because of all of the benefits. But it wasn’t that long ago when I tried to meditate and failed. I found it difficult. Now that I know more about my anxiety/stress disorder I understand that more.

But it wasn’t my stress disorder that kept me back from meditation. Thinking I had to meditate a certain way kept me back and I want to talk about that here. Because even if you have a lot going on in your life, I believe you can meditate. But it may not look like what you normally think of when you hear the term.

Positioning

When you think of meditation you probably picture someone sitting cross-legged, often with their thumbs and fingers touching over their knees. The following photo shows that pose and that pose is what I got 8 out of 8 times with AI.

Woman Meditating Becoming One With the Universe and Galaxy

When you’ve never meditated before, that pose can be very unusual. It may take a lot of energy simply to keep the pose. You may even feel like a “poser” imitating the masters and have imposter syndrome. It just doesn’t feel natural and that just makes things more difficult than they need to be.

I tried meditating this way at first and I failed. It was too frustrating to me. Some people can do it right away, but this doesn’t have to be how you meditate.

Lying Down

You can lie down. The reason regular meditators might say you shouldn’t lie down is because it is easier to get drowsy and fall asleep. I would say that may be true if you are not getting enough sleep. And, if that’s the case, you should be sleeping. Just find another time to meditate when you’re not tired because you got enough sleep.

Also, when I lie down to meditate, I sometimes use a plastic acupressure mat. The points help to relax the muscles. They may take some getting used to. But when I lie down on them in my bed, with enough bounce, it is the perfect amount of pressure and I have fallen asleep on it before. Using the mat has been great (for me) to relax the body and I often to turn to it when I have insomnia.

Even while asking AI to depict someone lying down to meditate, most pictures show them sitting, and when you do get someone lying down they’re propped up in some way. This clearly shows a bias towards sitting meditations in media that the AI is being trained on. You can just lie with your head on a pillow.

Types of Meditations

When I first tried lying down and listening to an Abraham-Hicks meditation (the one with lullaby music), I got more relaxed. Esther Hicks suggests 15 minutes a day, but I tried to listen to it again and blissfully “spaced out.” I had finally tried something that worked to allow me to release resistance while awake.

I believe it’s her breathing spacing that really helped me. I am learning more about breathing and how important it is to do it correctly. I think that I learned some bad habits concerning breathing and I know that slowing down your breathing can help you feel less stressed. It’s like telling your body that it’s time to move out of fight or flight mode and into relaxed and repairing mode.

Shop Around for Meditations

I am not saying everyone will have the same experience with the Abraham-Hicks meditations. I don’t believe that. Some people can be very turned off by the language or the lullaby music for their own personal reasons. But I suggest that you shop around with meditation music or guided meditations. You’ll find many free ones on YouTube.

I have made some meditation videos on my Christian Youtube channel and Hacking Your Life YouTube Channel. But if those are not your thing, continue looking. I believe you can find something that helps guide you into a more relaxed state.

Also if you are okay with wearing headphones, binaural beats may be very helpful. You’ll find plenty of those meditations on YouTube as well. You can read my information on Binaural Beats on my other Substack below.

What Are Binaural Beats?

Thinking or Feeling Too Much

So far I’ve discussed that you may be trying to do meditation in a less beneficial position (sitting up) and maybe you’ve tried less beneficial meditation tracks to listen to (or none at all). You can try changing those up as I’ve said. Another tricky part of meditation is when you go to meditate, thoughts keep occurring to you.

You may try to meditate to get away from the very busy work-world, and then sit or lie down to meditate and as soon as you do, a thought might come up about something you’ve forgotten to do or feel you should be doing. Some people might tell you to simply “quiet your mind” so you can let the thought pass by you.

I would say, you should actually pay attention to the thought. Ask yourself how important it is. If it’s not going to take long to do, you might as well do it and come back to meditate right after. If it will take long, start a list of things you feel like you should do and work on it after your meditation.

I think of these thoughts as God-Source reminding me to do something I’ve been putting off. Those urges to go do something are often divine inspiration. And I think sometimes people who put them off are ignoring their divine inspiration. To me, the whole point of meditating is to tap into that divine inspiration and start seeing and thinking like God-Source on things in order to have a more fulfilled life.

That said, sometimes the thoughts are negative thoughts, like anger because of a fight or something you feel wronged about. You may have an angry desire to hurt someone. Obviously, you shouldn’t intentionally hurt someone. But the reason this is coming up is so that you can deal with your anger. It’s important to let the anger be felt, seen, and heard, rather than just repressing it as if it’s “evil”.

If you feel strong emotions, you can use the meditation time to pay attention to how those emotions are making your body feel. This will help in mindfulness throughout the day and it helps to let go of these emotions so they don’t stick around in your vibration/mindset. Those strong emotions are telling you something.

You can ask yourself what the core reason you’re upset about is. Sometimes you can feel angry (because you think someone let you down perhaps) and if you ask yourself where the anger is coming from, you’ll find out it’s because you are afraid of what would happen if that person wasn’t there. You will find out anger is often fear at its core. But they are two separate emotions that you may feel in different ways. Allow yourself to feel your feelings and notice how they affect your body. Simply being mindful is its own version of meditation.

Meditation Can Look Different

I hope what you’re taking from this article is that meditation does not have to be exactly like you see depicted in art or videos. Sometimes it’s messy, like getting up and down, making lists, for example. Sometimes it’s lying down and looks to someone else like you’re just relaxing (while you’re actually examining your thoughts, feelings, and physical sensations).

There are many ways to meditate. You don’t need to listen to guided meditations. But the ones with breathing prompts may be helpful when you’re first starting out if you have more anxious breathing habits. I just recently heard someone say 75% of the studied population with panic disorders or anxiety have dysfunctional breathing. That’s amazing to me.

Don’t Give Up Without Trying Various Ways

Allow yourself many attempts to meditate. I don’t want you to give up at all. But I know I gave up too early. Try different modes until you find one that fits your lifestyle.

Also, as you continue to meditate, you will still probably mix and match different ways. Now I do meditate sitting cross-legged, but I still go back to meditating lying on the bed as well. I do sometimes get up to go do something when I feel an inspiration to do something else first. I sometimes make lists of things I need to remember to get to afterward. Sometimes I do bliss out relaxing, and other times I think of old traumas and cry.

I don’t believe you should try to force yourself into doing it one way or another. Just allow yourself to find what feels right to you in the moment.

A woman lying down with her legs up. Those legs are going to get tired. AI is really bad at depicting people meditating while lying down. You can lie with your legs straight out in front of you.